That is why bother
by DazedConfusedAndHappyAboutIt
Summary: An existentialism-centered story I wrote for a class I'm taking. Something goes wrong on a job and Shinra tries to help Celty get over the mental repercussions Please comment!


Muscles contracted. A young doctor shot up from his bed; a nightmare had invaded his mind and swarmed and multiplied until fear bested his conscious mind. Sweat had formed on his brow and heat seemed to radiate every bit of his surroundings. His limbs trembled as he attempted to calm alerted nerve. Shinra looked around frantically, similar to a gazelle on the plains of a far away land.

A figure bursts through his door, cloaked by shadows. Such hasty movement to reach Shinra's side only seemed to send horrified signals through every fiber of his being. The figure stood just to his side, looking down towards him. A swift motion released some device. Moments turn to hours as the figure meddles with this object, as dark as night.

Bright light.

A PDA shown in Shinra's face.

[I heard a shout. Is everything okay? ]. Shinra stared long and hard at this glowing screen, visually impaired without his glasses.

"Yeah…I'm ok. Just a bad dream." The figure sat next to Shinra, stroking his matted, light-brown hair. Though he did enjoy when his roommate did this, Shinra didn't want to have his cheek pinched more than necessary. He stared at the figure's face, or rather, where there should've been one.

His roommate was neither his spouse, nor colleague, nor normal houseguest. For twenty years, he shared a condominium with such a fascinating creature as she; a fairy of Celtic folklore. Celty Sturluson did not have a head, though she could see, hear, and smell. Her neck stopped in a clean line across, though it constantly emit something that resembled black smog. She was, to Shinra, beautiful, though he would argue that even such a word so immensely understated her beauty. As she sat next to Shinra in her oversized shirt and baggy pants, he couldn't help but feel slightly at ease. After twenty years, she seemed to have that effect on him.

When she stood to return to her own room, Shinra playfully complained about her absence. He continued on, even after Celty was out of sight, even when he narrowly dodged a flying slipper thrown at him. As he situated himself back into his bed, he smiled to himself, content with the simple interaction the two had. He quickly returned to the realm of dream and deep sleep, thinking of his headless companion, just a few yards away.

Where Shinra did not dream, Celty dreamt of her home of Ireland. The wide-open fields and crisp air brushed across her body. Dusk and horse sped toward the far off horizon at speeds unmatched by anyone but each other. The loud claps of hoof against ground seemed to not only echo throughout the light, but through mind and spirit. But, something seemed…off.

With night beginning to fall, Celty stopped. The rush of pseudo-adrenaline that accompanied her had faded. She felt... empty; as if some organ had been taken from her without her knowledge. It grew and grew and she had no idea why. What had once brought her joy, no longer did. There was a bright light.

She stood over a bed that wasn't hers. She saw someone in it, fast asleep. As she lifted her arm, shadows seemed to contort and wretch themselves from the very walls into a long and slender object. In her hand was a pitch-black scythe. She raised it and felt its awful power course through her unmoving veins, heart, being. The man roused from his sleep, rubbing his eyes; he was old, tired, sick. It was his time to be taken. She hesitated.

Muscles contracted.

There was no blood; the scythe slid through the man's soul, but not his flesh. Celty began to turn, but thought she saw something beside the man; something that was out of place. She inched towards him. There, curled up next to him, was a dog. And its body was as stiff as the man's.

She looked at the dog. Its calmed breathing had stopped. Its tongue no longer moved haphazardly, nor its nose expanding then contracting in random spasms. No more twitch of its snout in a dream of chase. No more spasm of muscle as paw jerked suddenly. All of the things that made this dog so, had ceased. Celty hesitantly reached out to stoke the dog's cheek.

She stopped. She couldn't bring herself to disturb it how it was. She drew her hand back and felt oddly…hollow. Such an innocent life now was gone. No longer could it wag its tail, or feel wind thrash fur speeding down a highway. Life was cut short in an unforeseen accident. Out of everything, she wanted the dog to lie where it was as if nothing had happened; as if it were still sleeping.

Even when she got home, Celty stayed afflicted with grief and pessimism. _It's not right that that dog died because of me. Why wasn't I more careful_, she thought. She turned from grief to disdain for herself; for bringing about an unnecessary death. She sat silently, staring at her shaking hands, so blinded by emotion that she didn't hear the front door open.

"Hey Celty," Shinra exclaimed, a wide smile stretched across his face. Her gaze didn't falter. Shinra felt her emotions radiating from Celty's body.

"What's on your mind?"

[I did something terrible….]

"Do you want to tell me what it is?"

[I killed a dog… It wasn't doing anything, it wasn't ready to die.] Celty stared blankly at her PDA.

"But do you think that stopped the dog from living the way it did?] Celty craned her neck in a confused position.

[What do you mean?]

"I mean, do you think that dog had any regrets about its life? I mean, sure, its life probably could've gone for a few more years, but do you think that stopped it from being happy?" She slowly turned her gaze to Shinra as he continued talking.

"At one point or another, it would've died; Maybe tomorrow, maybe ten years from now. But my point is that it lived like it would've died. It never cheated itself of any experience. You never know when you're going to die, so why do differently? Why do things that don't make you happy? Why cheat yourself of any experience?"

[I don't know…]

"Okay, let's put it this way: If you knew I was going to die twenty-four hours from now, what would you do?" Celty thought for a few moments.

[I'd want to spend every second with you that I could.]

"Exactly. So why pretend that life isn't so easily taken away? Why not consider the possibility that something alive today could be dead tomorrow?"

[I don't know…]

"That dog probably died a better life than its owner. It probably lived like the next day was its last and did the things that made it happy, more times than not. Do you think its owner could say the same?" Celty shrugged her shoulders.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is… Because you never know when you're going to die, why do things that would make you unhappy? But for the same reason, why live any day like it wasn't your last? Does that help?"

Celty tilted her neck as if staring at the ceiling in deep thought. Upon escaping her trance, she took her PDA. [A lot, surprisingly. But if you're going to die anyways, what's the point in living?]

Shinra read the characters on the illuminated screen, thought long and hard, and proceeded to adorn his companion with affection. After much struggle, she finally subdued him with a firm punch to the gut.

[What was that for?]

"How did that make you feel? My hugging you". Celty thought again, and came to her conclusion.

[To be honest, it felt good, warm, fuzzy. I was happy.]

"That, right there, is why bother living."


End file.
